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    You’re the poetry man / You make things all right

    I haven’t had many interesting search strings lately, but two have cropped up in the last 24 hours. I tell you–the things people expect Google to help them out with! Someone wanted to know “How do you break it off with a married man?”

    Uh, let’s see. How about “We really shouldn’t be doing this. I’m sorry, but I can’t see you anymore”? Is that too obvious, or something? It’s wise not to add the part when you burst into tears and go, “Dammit, you PROMISED me you were going to LEAVE her! How could you keep stringing me along like this when you KNOW I can make you happier than she does?” That has a way of interfering with closure. (No, I don’t know this from having dated a married man myself; but this being Japan, I have a few friends who have.)

    The other odd search was “dating: lose the coin purse.” I can only assume this was intended as advice? But then, why enter it as part of a search? One doesn’t go to Yahoo to tell it things, after all. Besides, in my experience, having one is taken as a conversation-starter, prompting opening lines that range from “Beautiful coin purse!” to “I should get one of those myself–Japanese money is so heavy,” which apparently seem less bald than “Come here often?” (though one gets that one a lot, too). Of course, I suppose it depends on the item itself; a lot of coin purses probably look faggy to a fair number of straight women.

    Oh, and for the love of Poseidon, I still don’t know whether Röb M@rciano is a freakin’ homosexual.

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