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    My bottle of Laphroaig and I are watching the SOTU

    21:12 or so: “The government has been unable or unwilling to solve many of our problems.”

    Hmm.

    Gee.

    I wonder which one it is.

    *******

    21:25: “When you talk to small-business owners in Allentown, Pennsylvania,…”

    …you realize that you don’t know crap about economic reality and should stop trying to manipulate it?

    *******

    21:27: “…the infrastructure of tomorrow.”

    Oh, no—here comes the choo-choo train.

    *******

    21:28: Offshoring is evil. Shifting jobs abroad may do things like give low-income consumers cheaper goods to buy, but who cares about trivialities like that?

    *******

    21:32: “Look, I’m not interested in punishing banks.”

    I’m just going to impose a fee on them that’ll get passed on to their depositors and debtors…at least, if the banks are big. Being a big business is almost as evil as offshoring. Or maybe more.

    *******

    21:36: “And, yes, it means passing a comprehensive energy and climate bill.”

    There was a doubt that these people were thinking of problem-solving in terms of a comprehensive [fill in the blank] bill? Oh. I was not aware of that, actually.

    *******

    21:37: “We need to export more of our goods.”

    Doesn’t that mean other countries are offshoring jobs to us and are therefore all kinds of venal and stuff, then? Or are we only going to export things no one else makes?

    Every time you give a non-American a job, God kills a kitten.

    *******

    21:40: Color me skeptical that any education reform, bipartisan or no, will be undertaken in a way that spanks non-performing assets ensconced in the NEA or AFT and keeps them from screwing over kids anymore.

    *******

    21:41: Watch for college tuition to increase by an average of US$2500 a year once that tax credit goes through.

    *******

    21:47: “As temperatures cool….”

    WTF? I thought there was scientific consensus around global warming?

    *******

    21:56: “Rather than fight the same tired battles that have dominated Washington for decades…”

    …you should face that it’s time to STFU and do what my fellow-travelers and I want anyway.

    *******

    21:57: Did you know that lobbyists had been excluded from policy-making jobs in Obama’s administation? ‘Cause I didn’t know that lobbyists had been excluded from policy-making jobs in Obama’s administration. And naturally, he and his fans are for the Incumbent Protection Act McCain-Feingold.

    *******

    21:59: You know, I care about earmarks, too; but I care even more about whether congresscritters actually know what’s in stimulus and health-care legislation before they vote on it. It’d be nice if they posted that on a single, accessible website, too. Maybe I’m weird that way?

    *******

    22:00: You were the one whose triumphant line was “I won,” buster. And the “permanent campaign,” as it used to be called, started under Clinton. IIRC, he was one of yours. Also, if you don’t like hearing people blame the other side all the time, maybe call a moratorium on the Bush-blaming?

    *******

    [ongoing]: Laphroaig, why you so good to me?

    *******

    22:09: “North Korea is more isolated than ever.”

    Brrrr…it frightens me just to think about it. I mean, if North Korea supposedly idealized something like…oh, I don’t know, “self-reliance,” then maybe it’d be different.

    *******

    22:12: “If you abide by the law, then you should be protected by the law.”

    And if you violate tax law, but you have a cool resume, then you should be in my cabinet.

    *******

    22:14: The DADT thing sneaked in—Eric was saying it would.

    *******

    22:16: “Cynicism”? Uh, no. Just not child-like faith that government can solve everything by butting into it.

    *******

    22:19: You know, I hate to sound like a jerk, but the idea that that little boy thought his allowance should go through Washington to get to the needy in Haiti, and that Obama finds that stirring, is telling.

    *******

    22:33: I’m watching at whitehouse.gov, where a bunch of aides are sitting around a table fielding questions submitted electronically. My primary feeling is that every one of them really needs a good lay.

    *******

    22:59: Good grief, stop saying, “That’s an excellent question.” They’re all hand-picked. We know they’re all hand-picked. Nothing that isn’t considered a strategically good question for some reason or other is going to figure into this dog-and-pony show. Affecting any surprise at all at the perspicacity of the question you’re called upon to address fools no one. Just once, I want one of these Ken dolls (or the one Barbie in the group) to show some spirit, look unblinkingly at the camera, and say, “That’s the dumbest f***ing question I’ve ever heard in my life.”

    Added later: Eric sort of ended up live-blogging; his verdict is here.

    One Response to “My bottle of Laphroaig and I are watching the SOTU”

    1. Eric Scheie says:

      Thanks for the link, Sean. Your post is great. I should I refuse to live-blog more often!

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